Expectations

A common theme this past week that keeps popping up is expectations. Its a tricky thing, and probably is the cause of most break-ups and misunderstandings. And, like a friend mentioned, when you are constantly changing, from second to second, is it unreasonable for anyone to have expectations of you at all? Of course some things stay constant. Like values. You can expect to be able to rely on someone to stick up for you or be there when you need them. But expectations have a way of growing into an idealistic view of someone. Its easy to liken it to meeting girlfriends. So many girls are just nuts so when I meet a cool one I think, wow, this girl really has it all together. What an unrealistic expectation! Who really has it all together? And then when you grow close of course you realize that they have insecurities and problems just like you and everyone else you know. Its more disappointing when you are dating someone you are really into and grow these expectations without realizing it until they let you down. Or worse, you find that YOU let THEM down due to the same stigma. As another friend noted, they find out all along that you are just really you. Good, bad, ugly, beautiful. So are expectations akin to stereotypes in that they help you organize your thoughts and feelings into different tidy little schemas and may help act as a defense mechanism and therefor are somewhat protective and therefor proactive? Or do they just get in the way because after creating that beautiful glow when you meet the "perfect" man/woman/whatever it turns around and punches you in the stomach for being so naive? By that, I meant that no one is perfect. I know you find that someone perfect for you. But it is easy to confuse the two. SO, I'll leave you on the great advice of Oprah, I agree with some of the things she says but of course think myself above the advice she gives to the silly masses. You want to find someone who not compliments you, but someone who supplements you. one of the best things i think I've heard this week.