First of all I'll set some things straight. I am a 29-year-old female living with my fiance. I'm sure my parents had an inkling that we might be fornicating but as they are a bit old-fashioned it's never something that has been discussed. And still, technically, has gone unspoken...
A few weeks ago my live-in paramour came in contact with poison ivy while running along the lake. The rash quickly showed itself around his waist and spread to his thighs.
Being the kind, caring and domestic lover I've read that I'm supposed to emulate, I tended to his wounds buying him creams and potions and cooing the occasional, "Poor Baby." I, myself, have never contracted this poisonous rash and had therefor deemed myself immune. Flash forward a couple of weeks:
I thought that by mere coincidence I had come down with some other sort of rash. The rash started on my left hand and then showed up mid-inside-thigh and eventually under my chin. The rash did not look like poison ivy; sure it was itchy and bumpy but it looked nothing like my bedside partner's. So, I decided to see if my all-knowing parents knew what it could be. They did.
Apparently poison ivy can be spread through human contact. Each time the disease is passed along it gets diluted. That explains why my case did not look similar to my boy's.
Unfortunately for me I had mentioned where his rash was, on his waist and thighs. Fortunately for me, my parents didn't ask me how I came to have the rash on my inner thighs and chin. I'm just hoping they either don't have vivid imaginations or have forgotten how to make the zexy time...
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